Gaming and Internet Issues: When Teens Get Stuck Online
When gaming starts to take over, it can feel frustrating and hard to manage as a parent. What may have begun as something enjoyable, can begin to affect sleep, school and family life.
In this Let’s All Talk Mental Health session, Family Psychotherapist for the National Centre for Gaming Disorders, Alison Smith spoke about why gaming can become so compelling, when it becomes a concern, and how parents can respond in a way that supports both boundaries and connection.
Why is gaming so engaging?
Gaming offers reward, progress and connection all of which are particularly appealing during adolescence. It can provide:
a sense of achievement
social connection
a way to switch off from pressure
One of the things highlighted in the session was how certain games are designed to keep players coming back. The three most commonly seen in clinical settings are Fortnite, Minecraft and Call of Duty. These games often run on continuous loops with no clear end point, meaning there’s always “one more round”, “one more level” or another reward just ahead. Combined with team play, live interaction and in-game rewards that appear at just the right moment, this makes it particularly hard for teenagers to stop, not because they don’t want to, but because the design keeps them engaged. For some young people, especially those who are neurodiverse, gaming can also feel more manageable than everyday life.
When does it become a concern?
Gaming becomes more of a concern when it shifts from something a young person enjoys to something that feels hard to control, when it starts to take priority and is difficult to reduce. You might notice:
struggling to stop
difficulty sleeping
withdrawal from family or school
continuing despite negative effects
What sits underneath?
A key message from this session was that gaming is often not the main issue. It may be helping a young person cope with:
anxiety or pressure
social difficulties
low mood or confidence
overwhelm
Understanding this can change how parents respond.
What helps
When tensions rise, moving straight to restriction can increase conflict. Instead, a helpful starting point is:
staying calm
being curious
showing interest
For example: “I can see this matters to you, what do you enjoy about it?” Alongside this, clear boundaries still matter. These tend to work best when:
discussed at calm times
introduced collaboratively
consistent, rather than reactive
Looking beyond gaming
Rather than focusing only on reducing screen time, it can help to widen a young person’s world by:
encouraging other strengths or interests
involving trusted adults or peers
recognising small steps
The aim is to build balance, rather than simply remove gaming altogether. What matters most is staying connected, being curious about what gaming is doing for your teenager, and keeping communication open, even when it feels difficult.
When to seek additional support
It may help to seek support if gaming is affecting sleep, school or wellbeing, or if tensions at home are ongoing. This could include school support, a GP, CAMHS or specialist services like the National Centre for Gaming Disorders who have a self-referral option.
At the National Centre for Gaming Disorders, clinicians typically look for three key patterns, usually present over a period of 12 months or more:
Difficulty stopping or controlling gaming
Gaming becoming more important than anything else (including school, friendships or family life)
Continuing to game despite negative consequences, such as poor sleep, conflict at home or struggling at school
These patterns tend to build over time, which is why they can be easy to miss at first.
Watch the full session
Watch the full session with Alison Smith on the Let’s All Talk Mental Health hub here.
Resources
Link to National Centre for Gaming Disorders website
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